NFBE Chapter 252 [Empire] I didn't fool myself.
Chapter 252 [Empire] I didn't fool myself.
I nodded and gave a simple answer without saying much.
Wen Ya's expression didn't change much; he remained calm and composed, but I noticed his eyes dropped slightly, revealing a hint of sadness that was hard to conceal. His fingers gently stroked the rim of the cup, seemingly a subconscious movement, yet with a hint of hesitation.
"So that's how it is..." He whispered, his tone tinged with a hint of emotion and helplessness. He didn't look at me again, but simply lowered his eyes, as if he was deep in thought, or as if he was suppressing some emotion deep in his heart.
"What's wrong?" I asked subconsciously, trying to keep my tone as calm as possible.
He shook his head slightly and forced a faint smile: "It's okay, I didn't expect it to be him. It's just... a little unexpected."
Wen Ya's expression was calm, but a shadow of sadness lingered. He set the teacup down, the subtle clink of its bottom against the tabletop distinctly audible. He lowered his eyes, as if thinking, or perhaps suppressing something.
I don’t know why, but a ridiculous thought suddenly popped up in my mind: Is he feeling inferior?
When this thought came to my mind, I was shocked myself, but the more I looked at his expression, the stronger this feeling became.
Wen Ya was always gentle and composed, never competitive, and rarely showing jealousy or resentment about anything. He always stood by, overseeing everything with the demeanor of an elder, never trying to prove anything. But at this moment, I felt that his silence and downcast gaze revealed a hint of loss.
"Wen Ya," I whispered his name, trying to see the emotions in his eyes, "What are you thinking about?"
He raised his head at the sound, forced a smile, and said in a gentle voice: "Nothing, just a little surprise."
It was just a bit unexpected.
"It's just a little unexpected." Wen Ya said in a low voice, her tone as light as a feather passing by, but it left a weight that could not be ignored.
I chewed over this sentence silently, savoring its meaning. Surprise? Was it just a surprise? But his eyes weren't just filled with surprise. Instead, they were tinged with a complex mix of emotions—disappointment? Helplessness? Even a hint of inferiority?
I lowered my head, pretending to focus on the breakfast on my plate, but his expression as he spoke just now kept replaying in my mind. Such gentleness was rare; he was always composed, never letting on easily. But this time, the slightly downcast look and the barely maintained curve of his lips gave me a faint sense of something.
I looked up, staring at his downcast eyes and deliberately concealed expression. Suddenly, a mischievous thought came to my mind, and I joked directly: "This scene should be filmed."
Wen Ya was stunned for a moment, then looked up at me, seemingly caught off guard by my sudden remark. His brows raised slightly, a faint smile playing at the corner of his mouth. "Oh? Am I that worthy of a photo?"
"Of course it's worth it." I deliberately drawled out my words, holding up my teacup to block the corners of my mouth that were about to curl up. "Wen Ya, who is always calm and composed, actually showed such an 'unexpected' expression. It's not common to see her like that."
He let out a laugh, his gaze regaining some composure, as if the slight emotion he'd felt earlier had been dispelled by the joke. He looked at me and shook his head slightly. "It seems I didn't give you anything worth recording last night. Are you regretting it again today?"
However, I was not as relaxed as our joke.
Even though I pretended to be relaxed and even teased him with a joking tone, my heart was always heavy, as if a stone was pressing on it.
His momentary gloom and silence with his head down were like a shadow that could not be ignored.
His smile was peaceful, and he responded to my jokes with a familiar warmth, as if nothing was unusual. However, although his eyes had regained clarity, they seemed to be hiding something deep within that he wouldn't fully reveal to me.
"I really can't do anything about you." His words sounded very natural, but I could clearly catch a hint of avoidance from the depth of his tone.
Suddenly, I realized that Wen Ya was not as gentle as he appeared. This man was a super disguised guy, his mask was too thick, so thick that I could no longer see the clearness that I had when we first met.
Once upon a time, his eyes were so clear and pure that one could see through them at a glance. Whether it was his words or the demeanor in his gestures, they all carried an innate sincerity, even a little clumsy.
Since when did his eyes lose their clarity? Dark emotions crept into his eyes, hiding beneath his calm exterior. He still spoke gently, but it felt like he was hiding something.
He hid everything very well. He thought he was good.
It's already very unnatural.
He was smiling, his tone gentle, his expression composed, as if nothing had happened. But I could sense the measuredness of every movement and every word, a carefully calculated stiffness. Slow and heavy.
I didn't say anything else, just hugged him gently. Wen Ya in my arms was still calm and composed, even with a hint of warmth, but I knew clearly that his disguise was still there, so thick that it was difficult for me to touch the real him.
I once said "I love you" to him, though looking back now, I don't quite understand what I was thinking at the time. Perhaps it was impulse, or perhaps it was driven by some vague emotion.
I've always thought I wasn't a procrastinator.
But no matter what happened in the past, I know that I don't want to fool my feelings like he did, and I don't want this love to become a part that cannot be distinguished between true and false among layers of masks.
"Wen Ya." I whispered his name, my voice a little hoarse, as if trying to hide the uneasiness in my heart. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and finally whispered softly once again: "I love you."
This sentence truly requires effort. I can feel the tension building inside me, like something heavy weighing down my chest. It's not just because of the weight of these three words, but also because I know that after I say this, things might be different between us. I pretend I don't understand. I feign clarity. In this moment, I begin to resemble him.
Not that similar.
Wen Ya's body stiffened slightly, then relaxed, as if she accepted these words, but did not respond immediately.
He just leaned silently in my arms, his hands gently on my shoulders. His movements were gentle, but they made me feel a vague sense of distance.
My heart felt like something was pulling at it, a little painful and a little helpless.
But at least I didn't fool myself.